You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
