So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
