My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
