what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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