Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
