I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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