I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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