yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Randomize
