And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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