soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize