our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Let's get the cat blown out
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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