The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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