I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
