false alarm. still invincible.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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