you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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