Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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