Is it normal to miss your booty call?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
