It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Are we still banned from the library?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize