About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
