sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I want to fling myself into the sun
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
