when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
