One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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