I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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