What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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