So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize