i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
