At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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