I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize