we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
