the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Randomize
