remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
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