wake up i wanna do it froggy style
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
