i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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