what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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