I just saw a hot homeless man
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
