In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
