I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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