didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
