Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
from now on my penis is your penis
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
