I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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