im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
