Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
