There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Life is so much better after having sex.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
