You're completely useless in the revolution.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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