alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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