If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize