Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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