We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize