me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
