He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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