Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
My feet surprised me
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
