Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
